Lesson 5 - I am never upset for the reason I think

Lesson 5: "

1. The Lesson

"I am never upset for the reason I think."

This idea can be applied to any situation, person, or event you believe is causing you pain. Be specific when identifying both the form of upset and what you perceive to be its cause. Examples include:

"I am not angry at ____ for the reason I think."

"I am not afraid of ____ for the reason I think."

2. Explanation

The core teaching of this lesson emphasizes that our emotional upsets are never truly caused by external events or people. Rather, our distress originates from internal interpretations—old thoughts and meanings we have unconsciously projected onto current situations. Our mind often lives in the past, coloring our perception of the present and creating unnecessary suffering.

Teachings from the text:

"The one wholly true thought one can hold about the past is that it is not here."

"You think that what upsets you is a frightening world, or a sad world... All these attributes are given it by you. The world is meaningless in itself."

Insights from mystical teachings:

Buddhism similarly teaches that suffering arises from attachment and aversion rooted in misperceptions. Liberation emerges as we recognize and dissolve these self-created illusions.

3. Integration with Christianity

In traditional Christianity, suffering can often seem external and punitive—linked to sin and guilt. Yet here, we shift perspective. Suffering arises not from external punishment but from our internal disconnection from God. When we are disconnected we believe blindly that all the stories and all of the beliefs we have learned in this life about ourselves and about our world is the utmost and there is no place in our minds to sense that we are not our thoughts. 

We identify ourselves completely with the story that have been leading us in this life. The story that we are not good enough, the story that we are not pretty enough, the story that we are never going to be happy, the story that we not good parents or good children, that this is not a safe place and we need to hide and protect or defend ourselves and so the battle begins. 

And this battle against reality that we have actually created is what we call suffering and it’s exhausting because we will never going to win, because, we are only trying to tell the rest of the world to be as we want them to be but at the same time we are daily treating it like they are not, so we are only creating the world that we do not like, thus the EGO wins, as it keeps us in the dream and it produces more time for us to learn and for him to existe. 

This is where Buddhism and the Bible come together on the issue of suffering: both recognize that suffering is not caused by external events themselves, but by the way we relate to them. In Buddhism, suffering arises because we resist what is — we crave for things to be different or we push against reality, and this resistance creates pain. Peace is found through acceptance, mindfulness, and letting go. Byron Katie echoes this ancient truth in a modern voice, teaching that suffering happens whenever we believe stressful thoughts that argue with reality. It is never reality itself that hurts us, but the unquestioned beliefs we carry about it. Healing, in her view, comes through inquiry, learning to meet reality without the burden of our inner resistance. A Course in Miracles goes even deeper, teaching that all suffering stems from the original belief in separation from God — a belief that created a dream-world of fear, loss, and guilt. According to ACIM, the world we experience is not ultimate reality, but a projection of the mind that forgot its oneness with Love. True healing, then, is not just about making peace with life as it appears, but about waking up from the entire dream and remembering that we were never separate to begin with. While Buddhism and Byron Katie help us find serenity inside the dream by ceasing to fight it, A Course in Miracles invites us to awaken beyond the dream entirely — back to the eternal wholeness where suffering does not exist.recognizing and healing this internal separation, rather than attempting to control external circumstances.

4. Bible Verses and New Meaning

Matthew 6:22-23

"The eye is the lamp of the body. If your eyes are healthy, your whole body will be full of light. But if your eyes are unhealthy, your whole body will be full of darkness. If then the light within you is darkness, how great is that darkness!"

New meaning:

Traditionally interpreted as moral guidance, we now see this passage as highlighting the power of perception. Healthy perception—clear of past biases—illuminates our experience. Distorted perception, burdened by past grievances, leads to emotional suffering. By correcting our internal vision, we transform our experience of reality.

5. Message 

Today’s lesson from "A Course in Miracles" is profound:

"I am never upset for the reason I think."

Reflecting deeply on this, I feel called to share a personal journey that profoundly shaped my understanding of this truth. In 2024, I found myself spiraling into deep depression. It was overwhelming, dark, and I felt completely lost. For days I could not get out of bed and all I could think of was my son asking mommy what is wrong with Dad.  But within that darkness, a journey of profound healing and self-discovery began.

At First, I could not listen, read, talk even spiritual things or classical music that always brings me peace. But my mother send me a prayer, a very simple prayer from Hawai that was this woman putting the Ho’oponopono tradition in words. I  found solace in Ho’oponopono, gently repeating: "I’m sorry, please forgive me, thank you, I love you." It began opening doors within, helping me acknowledge responsibility for my own emotions and experiences.

Then, I reconnected to my body through exercise, grounding myself in physical sensations, slowly bringing clarity and energy back into my life. Meditation followed, deepening my self-awareness, calming my mind, and allowing me to observe my reactions without immediate judgment.

But a pivotal turning point came when I encountered the powerful writings and teachings of Byron Katie. Her method, "The Work," guided me to a critical realization: what triggered my emotions was not what others did, especially my wife, but my own reactions to her simply being herself. This insight placed me back in the driver’s seat of my emotional experience.

From that moment, whenever I felt triggered, I turned to a beautiful Kabbalah technique: pausing, breathing deeply, and sincerely saying, "Thank you, for giving me this opportunity to work on my Tikkun." Tikkun, as I came to understand, is our spiritual correction—the chance to expand our capacity to hold more Light, dissolving suffering and moving closer to our Source.

This practice helped me steadily step away from my ego’s instinct to blame the external world for my internal struggles. Each trigger became a gift, a chance to expand my spiritual vessel, allowing greater peace, joy, and connection into my life.

Today, as we reflect on this lesson—"I am never upset for the reason I think"—let’s gently remind ourselves that our emotional freedom lies not in changing others, but in healing and transforming our own inner reactions.

I’m deeply grateful for this path, for every step that brought clarity, love, and healing.

Thank you all for walking this beautiful journey alongside me. 

Have a wonderful day filled with awareness and inner peace!